Monday, October 16, 2006


I've never been a fan of pantyhose. I think the manufacturers use metal tubing as fit models when designing the things, because they never seem to actually work on something as exotically shaped as a human leg. I have tried some of the more expensive hosiery--paying $10 or 15 for a pair (ok, so my idea of "expensive" may not be the same as others....), but those things fit just as poorly and run just as fast as the cheaper ones.

I don't wear a lot of skirts normally, so I don't generally dwell on the topic. When you work primarily with computers and men 1) No one cares if you're wearing a skirt (your coworkers don't generally notice what you wear, as long as you're dressed) 2) If someone does notice that you're wearing a skirt, it's going to be someone who makes you feel very uncomfortable for having exposed your ankles, let alone your knees, and 3) You occaisionally have to climb under your desk to fiddle with wires and cords, and that's neither comfortable nor easy while avoiding runs and over-exposure.

This weekend, I got to delve into this lovely topic, with a twist: maternity pantyhose. I had successfully avoided the subject with Charlotte, since I was pregnant mainly in the summer when bare legs are expected. Unfortunately, Saturday was cold, windy, and we had a wedding to attend.

I tried looking at Target for somethign appropriate first, and could not find either soemthing labeled "maternity" or something that was "low-waisted" (in the hopes that they would ride under my bulging belly instead of cutting it in half at the midsection). Just in case I failed elsewhere as well, I did grab one pair in a vageuly flesh-toned color that at least claimed to have no "control-top" (those things are the devil...they squish your abdomen and make what fat you have bubble up around your waist and look even bigger....I have never understood how that's supposed to make you look slimmer). I then stopped by the maternity store in the Galleria. After spending probably 10 minutes reading 3 or 4 different package types for sizes, colors, and "features", I settled on the least expensive option--basic nude-colored hose.

The first pair I tried on at home was the "maternity" hose. I had picked the size range that seemed to correspond to my height and weight (I was smack dab in the middle of the range, so in theory they ought to be sized correctly). These things could have been made of denim for how much they stretched. It was a struggle to get my legs into them. When I got as far as my tummy there was enough length in the "panty" section to pull up and over the top of my head--if only it would fit over my belly. These suckers looked like they were made for a pre-pubescent, 8-foot teenager, not an average-sized preganant woman. Looking closer at the package, I realized that it claimed to be "full support" which is supposed to help reduce fatigue in your legs....funny, I'd have thought that cutting off your blood flow would make your legs more tired, not less.

The backup pair weren't much better around my tummy, but at least they actually stretched. I couldn't quite pull them up to my eyebrows (a common problem I face with pantyhose when I'm not pregnant), but the waistband was still really uncomfortable over my belly. I ended up wiggling them down under the belly, and spending the rest of the evening worried that they would slide right off my hips.

Maybe next time I'll go with thigh-highs.


Amanda said...

You know at the beginning of your commentary I was thinking, Oh, I'll tell her about thigh highs. But obviously, being a smart person, you thought of them too. It's all I wore during pregnancy. And actually still prefer to pantyhose. (I have always had the same problem with chest high waist bands. Apparently I'm supposed to be a huge woman given my leg length.) Oh and for the potty trainers with cute dresses for their girls, when my girl broke her leg panty hose were out of the question but girl's knee high socks work great as toddler thigh highs.

Kristi said...

I may have to try the sock thing for Charlotte. We actually sent her to daycare today in a pair of tights under a jumper, and I was wondering how she would do. Chances are, she'll be able to remove the tights without a problem, but putting them back on will be the issue (of course, getting her pants on straight is an issue without tights)

Anonymous said...

Well speaking as a man you are very wrong about whether in the workplace people notice you wearing a skirt and nylons....despite whether you think they are comfortable or not ( and by the way many women do think they feel and look nice)most men absolutely love the look and feel of a woman's leg when dressed in a skirt and pantyhose. I guess that sounds sexist but I don't mean it to be, its just that maybe in the workplace you are admired for the way you fdress in a more discreet manner than you realize. In fact most men I know are in withdrawl because of what seems to be the trend for women wearing pantyhose less and less...I say, and I don't think I am alone....Bring them back and wear them proudly ladies!